Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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