dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
