I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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