if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
