I want to make a zoo with you.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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