I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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