Christians are straight up FREAKS
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
