i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Everyone says I win the strip club
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
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