He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
