so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
third nipple confirmed
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
