I wanna bring you to show and tell
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
