If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
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