OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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