omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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