do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
