his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
i drank out of a bidet.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize