I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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