Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
