I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
