So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
