clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
