my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize