so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize