I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize