I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize