I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
