Buhtt sex?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Randomize
