Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
