My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
handjob tips. give me some.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
