Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize
