i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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