Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
