You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize