are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
