I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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