hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
