i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
