White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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