Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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