32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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