If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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