just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize