I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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