I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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