Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
