I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
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