So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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