Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize