would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
