TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize