well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize