remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
